I know. Some of you have been telling me for years. But in my own defense, AT&T wireless had been more than simply the lesser of evils to me, but actualy pleasant to deal with for almost ten years of service. Not only did I ignore my peer's condemnation of AT&T Wireless, but I even found myself acting as their advocate, defending them when I felt they were unjustly accused of being an evil and uncaring empire and even writting a glowing report to the public Collusion discussion list some six or so months ago regarding my pleasant equipment upgrade experience. Granted, it wasn't ten years of 20 bucks a month - roadside assistance phone service, but super-sized - all the fixin's - web enabled phone service averaging around $400-$500 a month. But whatever the reason for the adequacy of my service, I was quite content.

Well, all things must change and my wireless phone service now joins that category. Perhaps I should've seen the signs earlier this year when, while exchanging a phone, they wanted me to pay for the new phone immediatly but receive the refund for the return the following month. Whatever the case, they have more recently made it painfully clear that either they are completely inept at handling the simplest of problems or I am indeed a nonessential element in their scheme to suck up all the money they can. Or both.

It started to become clear when trying to make a change to my account back in September. For those that didn't know, Elvirus used to live with me (another reputation destroyed) and her account had resided on my bill since I first bestowed the gift of wireless communication upon her. She would almost never answer it, but it was good.

Sometime down the road we decided we could do more damage if we split up and so we did. As you probably guessed, it was sometime after this that the idea of separate bills came to mind. You might think as I did, "sounds simple enuf!" You would be wrong.

Here's how it started:
* Elvirus started the attempt by calling and requesting the phone be moved to a separate account in her name. She was told that she was not allowed to make changes to my account.
* Then it was my turn. I was told that I didn't have the right to setup an account in her name and under her credit. It was suggested that I give Elvirus my Social Security number so that she would have access to my account and could make the seperation. They also said they would notate this call on my account. I would find out later they didn't.
* I entrusted Elvirus with my nomenclature, but she was again declined stating that still she was not I, so soc sec or not, no access. It was then suggested that I have my account notated with my authorizing her to make changes to my acct.
* I did.
* Again, denied.
* I called back and discussed this problem ad nauseum with one of AT&T's finest when at the darkest point came a spark of brilliance, or at least it seemed at the time. Three-way! Sooo, I bopped over and rang up Elvirus who joined me in the melee with the AT&T Customer Service Operator until a point when they said that we had indeed accomplished the task we had taken on!

All was then better with the world, right? Wrong!!! The afore detailed play-by-play was but the first week or so in a four month marathon of transfers, redirection, misinformation, policy changes, and other types of failures. Each time they said they would notate that call on my account. They didn't.

I decided to stop paying my bill until the changes were made.

AT&T told me they would make the changes when I paid my bill.

Today I plan to check VoiceStream's prices. (I hear they're using GSM?)

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Editors note:
Attempts to contact AT&T Wireless's PR Dept for a response were initialy met with wrong and disconnected numbers. After a little leg work, TexorcisT was able to contact a Ken Woo of AT&T Wireless Public Relations, who passed this complaint to Chris Martin. Mr. Martin reiterated that AT&T would "accommodate his desire to modify his account...provided, of course, that [Operknockity] observe his part of this arrangement by paying his bill". We were surprised that AT&T seemed so uncompromising and somewhat flippant about losing a long standing high volume user. Operknockity stated he has no faith in AT&T's promises to "fix things after they get [his] money".